Adventure!

[Wesley]

A few weeks ago I referred to an adventure that I had...

Well, here it is!

An adventure in two parts...

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ADVENTURE : PART ONE
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Friday morning I climbed into my trusty, 30 year old Mercedes and picked up my friend Zach. We were headed to Eddystone, Southwest of Philly, so Zach could get his prosthetic legs adjusted.
About 20 miles from our destination, we started to smell something... burning? Rubber? Exhaust? Clutch? Driving in morning traffic, you always see, hear, or smell buses and trucks, dragging a wheel or cooking a clutch. There was a dump truck a few cars ahead of us with some funny looking smoke coming out, so I made the assumption that I had found the source of the mysterious smell.
I dropped my friend off at his appointment, and started heading to my brother's place. About a block away, I heard a funny rattle from under my hood. The engine was still running, but that was not a normal sound. I pulled over and popped the hood..... and discovered that the idler pulley had sort of turned itself inside out?!?! The fan belt was still mostly in place, still turning, and the engine was still running, so I made a quick decision to drop the hood and try to gently drive to the WalMart about 5 blocks away.
I made it as far as the back driveway of WalMart when I heard a sound that was no longer a mystery. Imagine the sound you make slurping a piece of spaghetti. Now imagine that sound made by a 30 year old block of cast iron and diesel combustion. Yeah, the belt had finally slipped, and got sucked, twisted, and tangled around the various pulleys on the front of the engine. Drat. (Yes, of course I said Drat. What, you think I screamed and yelled and cursed? Me?!?!)
I popped the hood and popped open my phone to find the closest auto parts store. Turns out there was an Auto Zone about 1 1/2 miles from me, and they had the new belt, and could get the pulley later in the day. Welp, nothing to do but take the old Shoe Leather Express. I started jogging and quickly remembered that I don't jog, so I slowed to a brisk walk.
I could not help but notice that I was walking through a part of town that was past its prime. Graffitti here, boarded up doors and windows there, that kind of thing. I stepped around a mattress and kept walking. I did see the remains of a lovely church that had fallen victim to arson. The stone work was still beautiful, even though the building was a ghost of what it used to be.
I got to Auto Zone, paid for the belt and pulley, and was assured that the afternoon parts truck wold arrive between 1 and 3 with my pulley. I took the belt and started the walk back to my car. Zach was still at his appointment, and I had a couple of hours before my parts would arrive, so I popped the hood to see what I could see.
It took a bit of twisting and pulling, but I got the old, shredded belt untangled from the rest of the mess. I collected what was left of the pulley, with the center melted out of it. What was still attached to the engine was the inner race, otherwise known as the part of a bearing you are never supposed to see. I guided the new belt around up over and under the pulleys where it was supposed to go, then I called my brother to see if he wanted to waste time with me.
He arrived and we pushed my car back into a parking spot. I had a few tools in my trunk, but not what I needed, so we walked into WalMart to get the stuff. I loosened the remains of the pulley from the engine block, and only dropped the Allen wrench into the fan shroud twice! By now, Zach was done with his appointment, and my parts had still not arrived, so Casper graciously offered to let me use his car to take Zach and myself home.
On the way home -- about 5:30 -- I got a call from Auto Zone. "Hey, your pulley is here..." Um, thanks. Not exactly between 1 and 3, but at this point it did not matter.
Got home, wrestled the cat, and mentally prepared for Part Two of my adventure the next day.

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ADVENTURE : PART TWO
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It was a dark and stormy night. Lightning flashed. A shot rang out. Someone screamed. Then I woke up and had some Cream of Wheat, fed the cat, drank some coffee, and started my drive back to Eddystone to rescue my car.
Before I dive in here, I just want to point out that it is about 100 miles from my house to my car. A trip I had done once the prior day, was about to do today, with some additional running around. 500 miles in 24 hours might put a flat spot in your butt.
Ah, where was I? Oh, yes, sitting on my butt in my brother's car, making my way through the morning fog on the PA Turnpike.
Not much traffic on a foggy Saturday morning, and I got to Auto Zone well before lunch. I had a Master Plan to slip the pulley in place, flip the belt back on, and be on my merry way.
I was so confident that I set a timer on my phone before I popped the hood on my Mercedes. Something something Pride goeth before a fall something something.
The first thing that happened is I popped the hood and stared at the engine for a moment. Next I gathered the tools from the back seat. Okay let's... um.... wait, where is the 7MM Allen wrench? I just bought this set Yesterday, wtf? Oh, crap, did I drop it when we were pushing the car back? I walked back and forth across the parking lot; I scoured the back seat, my trunk, my brother's car... Finally I was looking under the hood with a flashlight and saw the wrench peaking out from inside the fan shroud. Oh, yes, where I had dropped it the previous day. Looks like I should have read Part One before starting Part Two, ha haha!
I could not reach the wrench where it was positioned. My fingers are not long, thin, or flexible enough. I had to get a long screwdriver and hold it in my fingertips, then flick the wrench toward the center of the fan where I could snake my fingers in there and get it. Got it. Good.
Now that I had the tools I needed, it was time to get properly greasy. Positioning the pulley was not that difficult. Nor was getting the bolt into the center. The challenge was getting the belt over all the pulleys, and then over the spring-loaded high-tension idle pulley. Those Germans were not playing around when they designed this thing! I had this idea to put a piece of rope through the belt, then pull it and slide the belt into place on the pulley. NOPE!
Here is where the cursing comes in. I have a bent screwdriver in my toolbag from the last time I did this, so I grabbed it and tried to stretch the spring enough that I could hook it in place. POP! Dammit! Okay, let's try again.... POP! DAMMIT! There was much wailing and gnashing of teeth, and my bent screwdriver is now even more bent, but I finally got all the stuff back into place. Whew! One hour and eighteen minutes. But hey, once I turned the key, my crunchy old car cranked right up!
Now I need to get my brother's car back to him, or get him to his car, or whatever. I leave his car at WalMart and head North in my car. Pleasant drive. And I am still greasy. Meh. Anyway, when I get to my brother's place I get a friendly greeting and also a new challenge! "Since you are here, wanna help put a new garbage disposal in?" Um, hell yes!
Getting the old disposal out was the easy part. Wiring the new one was also fairly easy. Balancing and shoving the new one in place while getting the flange bolt secured.... well, that took removing a door from the sink, two idiots crammed under there with a flashlight. and a little bit of cursing. Trust me, the cursing helps. But we got it in, runs like a top.
We ordered some food and watched a good Pay Per View boxing event, then I took him down to get his car, and I headed home. I had time to wrestle Baki and watch a silly movie before going to bed.
Not a bad weekend so far ~