What makes me sad

[bella]

Yesterday I saw a preview of the movie 'Bully', I don't know if anyone of you has seen it.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W1g9RV9OKhg
It is a documentary about young kids, going to school and having to suffer every single day. There is this young boy, insecure, not wanting to take the school bus anymore because he is hit by others every time. How can kids be so mean and why? What happened that it got so far? And why the hell do the schools not do anything against it? If they are told about it they need to take action. Every kid should have the right to learn in a save environment. Every parent should feel save to let their kid go to school.

What many kids are unable to do is to change perspective. What effect does it have if I am being mean or even violent towards others? They wouldn't want to be in the situation of their victims. It's their parents task to show them and teach them if they are unbable to see it themselves.
Bullying needs to stop. No kid should feel so desperate to see no other way than commiting suicide.
As sad as this movie is, I do hope it changes people's minds.

[Beany]

Bullying in schools is not easy to tackle. Some schools tell the victims of bullying to ignore the bully, which generally makes it worse. Many people do not come forward when they are being seriously bullied because they don't believe it to be bullying, but think that they deserve it and that it's just what happens. Bullying is probably the worst thing about schools and even when it is not as serious as making the child want to commit suicide, it can hinder their education drastically.

At school we were shown a video about someone who was gay. He was bullied by his classmates because of it and first tried to commit suicide when he was six (I think - I can't remember exactly). Bullying is hard enough to cope with when it is only minor. I feel so sorry for the victims, especially those in the more serious cases. I feel sorry for the bullies as well, for feeling that they need to do this, but also ashamed of them.

[Shay]

orgy.. parents, teachers, policemen. Why the hell should they care if it's not personally getting them ahead? In fact, it might even be entertaining. Kids can't trust adults. They're all a bunch of balloon knot.

Parents:
Your brother refuses to walk home with you and scoffs at you, taking off with his friends and throwing rocks at you as he leaves. His friends ditch him and some bigger bullies show up. They force him to put his hand through the fence of a nasty dog. Then when you get home, your parents beat and blame YOU for your balloon knot brother getting beat up by bigger balloon knot.

Teachers:
It's the end of lunch hour and the school balloon knot (you know, everyone's favorite students that area head of the football team or school council) come walking by and knock your tray over for no apparent reason other than to give a few laughs to everyone around. The cafeteria is right outside the school office with nothing but windows. They watch and giggle. The moment you stand up, one of them intentionally runs into you with their shoulder, maybe call you a few names even, insult your [already balloon knot] parents. The moment you shove back, the principal and office attendants come at you and order you Saturday school suspension. See, nothing happens to the others because they're the "star" students. Wouldn't want to damage their school stats y'know.

Policemen:
So through the years of dealing with the balloon knot parents and the balloon knot teachers, eventually maybe you get fed up. Time to get someone who can actually help. You run away. When you're caught, you share all your unpleasant memories, recalling them as if they happened yesterday. The cop pretends to listen to you. He humors you to make you feel your safe while he's driving you back to that awful place. As you arrive, he tells yours parents of the wild stories you've been telling. Your balloon knot parents are very good at this. They put on a face that makes you believe they're saints. Forget the fact you're skinnier than maybe you should be. Forget the fact you have scuffs and bruises. That's all from playing outside and being active. To truly investigate would cost too much money, and what if they're wrong? Then they've wasted their time and look like a fool. They just couldn't have that.

So you see, in the immortal words of Effie...

Fakk'em!

[Clovvach]

MY school is actually pretty cool and I've never gotten bullied in my life before. We even have anti-bullying seminars like all the time.

[Beany]

We've had anti-bullying talks at our school before, and the teachers say things like, "If you're being bullied come and talk to one of us." Not all schools mean it though. My previous school was very anti-bullying, but someone used to tease me, then started hitting me with a belt (in school, in front of the rest of my class). And I was told to ignore him . My current school's a bit OTT about child welfare and have, in many cases, made things worse rather than better. For me, however, they decided to listen to the 'bully' (she used to be a friend, I can't call her a bully) and didn't speak to me about it for six months, yet spoke about me to many other students and teachers. Because of that, the 'bullying' (which was her way of seeking attention - bullying me and telling the teachers that I was bullying her, which I didn't find out about until a friend told me a while after it was all resolved) continued for around six months, and the teacher's only advice was to be civil around her. Again, not very useful.

Sorry, that's a bit of a ramble about my experiences of being bullied, but it helps me to understand the pains of being bullied more easily, and I can't imagine how awful it must be to be bullied as much as the people in these documentaries.

In response to Shay's comment about teachers not caring, my teachers only cared because I was missing a lot of school and they didn't know if it was because I was ill or because of this whole bullying thing (which they couldn't work out because at the time they thought that I was the bully).

[Shay]

I'm not saying this is the way it is for all adults. Merely playing devil's advocate to give another perspective.

[Beany]

I've just remembered something that a teacher said to me when I was bullied at my previous school. As it lasted over a cross between two school years, the teacher who said this was my teacher before the person started hitting me, and since it continued I told my new teacher. The first teacher told me that I was being bullied because I was an easy target, and offered no advice whatsoever. So what? Just because I don't hurl abuse at people who talk to me, that makes me an easy target? Just because I'm not the loudest kid in the class, I deserve to be bullied? Considering all of the talks they gave us about what to do when you're being bullied, I did expect them to do something about it, other than just telling me that it was my fault.

Sorry, I get really annoyed about bullying and people that just watch it happen without doing anything about it.

[Clovvach]

I'm actually more worried about becoming the bully than being bullied. I have a loud voice, and I'm outgoing, so it would make sense if I offend people with my words with out meaning to. Plus I'm autistic and sometimes I'm very oblivious to other people's feelings. Especially when there are some people laugh and act like their having a good time, and then they go home and report that they are being bullied. I'm sure other people can tell when they are faking it, but not me. There was this one kid who kept insisting that me and my friends were bullying him, and I barely even saw him. So I try to stay on my toes and make sure to stop whatever I'm doing if someone seems like they are being hurt and they are just not showing it. I just don't want it to end up where I do something and I unintentionally hurt someone, which for me is more likely then other people hurting me... and has happened a lot before to me. Even my parents used to say that I behaved towards one of my friends with "bully like behavior" which really got me down.

So many people are afraid to give me a hard time about anything because they're convinced that if they do it too much I'll beat them up or something, when truth is I despise harming people physically, and I don't remember ever doing it... it's all too confusing for me...

[bella]

I know that it isn't recognized easy sometimes because many things happen in the breaks or after school. If a child decided to talk to you, listen for heaven's sake.
Screw 'star' students, what makes them think they have the right to mistreat others for pure fun or to get more appreciated? Sad if they only can achieve it this way, upholding a facade. Screw teachers who don't act because they fear not being liked any more.
I do hope that young people who had to experience this in their youth can make it better for their own children.
Screw childcare if they don't listen to children's needs, that's their job. Rather investigate one more case uncalled-for than not acting at all.
Even if some think that it is normal between kids to bully each other, call each other names, push each other around, and life is tough, and they need to learn a lesson early (someone actually told me that) tell me why. Why should a kid suffer, lack self-confidence and feel bad about getting up each morning?
Make a difference if you can.

*end of rant*

[Eff]

Same as there will never be a world peace , bulling would live 4ever.
-Parents needs to keep n eye on their children making sure they are not bulling and not being bulled.
That is very sad .
Remember the bulling kid that zot once posted? the kid whohad enough and took the hell out'athe other kid that beat him?that was awesome.

[Beany]

One issue is what is classed as bullying. People sometimes 'bully' their friends for fun, like teasing them or being mean to them but in a jokey way. As long as the friends know that this isn't bullying, and are willing to accept it (note: willing), that is acceptable. But if someone starts acting like that and is unintentionally hurting other people's feelings, they don't often realise. If they are intentionally hurting others' feelings then they're horrible. Some people overreact though. If someone has a friendly dig at someone else, it doesn't mean that they are bullying them. These distinctions are often what causes problems with bullying in schools.

Someone I know was teasing their friend in the way that I mentioned first, during a lesson. Her friend said, "You always bully me!" in a really whiny voice. The teacher then hauled the person who was teasing their friend up to see the principal. Poor kid. A few weeks later, the two people were having a friendly argument in the same lesson, and the teacher said, "Well done ______, STAND UP to the bully." People can be investigated for bullying as a mistake, which can often have more serious consequences. My teachers investigated me for bullying a couple of years ago, when it was the person who I was supposedly bullying who they should have been investigating. It wasn't serious, but I'm still 100% anti-bullying.

At our school we have an anti-bullying policy. The school did not implement it when they realised their mistake. Why not? They were following it when they were investigating me as the bully, but dropped the whole thing when they found out that I was the one being bullied. Was that because I didn't make a great fuss about it? I know that I've told you a lot about what happened then before, but I really don't like the way it was dealt with. For a long time, everyone in my class, even at some points my closest friends, thought that I was a bully, picking on one of my friends. Some people still think that I used to bully her.

Sorry, I go into rants about bullying.

[Amlak]

lol, I had a bully who just wouldn't stop pestering me back in high school. The school was supposedly anti-bullying but not one teacher ever came up to get him off my back. I ended up in a physical fight with him in the middle of the main corridor hall in front of a crowd of other students. I don't know if there were any teachers there, but they sure didn't do anything about it. The audience seemed to have enjoyed it, though. And he did stop harrassing me after that.