Actual nice guys vs. "Nice Guys."

[chex]

A Facebook friend linked to this rant, and I wanted to share it.

http://divalion.livejournal.com/163615.html

[sizz]

A good read (I read all of it so it really was pretty interesting) but there were some bits where i was a little '...really?'. The person who wrote the article kind of assumed that there are these 'Nice Guy' men who- to summarise- are arrogant, generally suck at relationships and don't care much about the feelings of the women around them. Okay, there's a little more to it than that but that was the gist of it... anyway, I think that is definitely true. Out of my closer friends who are boys, a few have aspects of that- for instance, one is pretty arrogant and sucks at relationships but does care (well, did care- until she dumped him) about the girl's feelings. Another did the whole 'why won't you go out with me?' thing to a girl I know (admittedly, he had had a whole bottle of vodka at this point but it was still not cool) but I don't believe he holds a very high opinion of himself. In fact, thinking about it, a lot of guys have these characteristics. All of these boys that i know are actually really nice to me though because i'm dating one of their best friends. It's still annoying though because there are some really dickish boys around that hold a very high opinion of themselves and treat certain people around them badly.

I'm going to start a new paragraph because i got a bit distracted ranting... er, what i was actually going to say was I think many guys have these 'Nice Guy' characteristics but the person writing the article was basically a massive feminist and well.. she seems to think that there are only 'Nice Guys' and this is only regarding relationships. Surely there are 'Nice Girls'? I know plenty of girls who think they're perfectly brilliant, desperate for a boyfriend and don't understand why they're not getting them, then basically throw themselves at them by being a bit slutty, laughing a lot, blah blah blah. I know it's not really the same thing, but it's similar nonetheless. Also, i know the article was targeting relationships specifically but it sounded like this so-called 'Nice Guy' is simply another way of saying 'Arrogant Prick.' i imagine they'd probably be annoying in all aspects of life. Though maybe, i don't know, she's referring to men who treat their relationships differently to the way they'd treat their friends etc. i think the main thing is that i feel a bit like she's lumping all these arrogant guys together and stereotyping them... This is just my opinion and tbh i don't know much about guys anyway, unlike the author of that, but good article though.

That may not have made much sense because i am very tired and writing a very long essay right now...

[Wesley]

I see where you are coming from, Sizz, but I think this article was just focused on the men. There are indeed girls who are just as pushy or unsavory as the Nice Guys she is writing about, but that is for a different article.

From a Man's point of view, I have seen just about the whole range of positive and negative male behavior, and the results thereof. Nice Guys are not cool, and without rehabilitation, they never will be.

[Wesley]

Here is a story about nice girls. Well, girls who are not skanks. And how to deal with creepy guys.

http://beautilation.tumblr.com/post/33538802648

[Amlak]

I say to hell with the "nice guy" label.

There's "doormat guy". There's "cool guy". And there's "fake guy". All three categories have had the label "nice guy" attached to them. But none of them should have it anymore as it's been way overused and, quite honestly, become dull. Just let it die already.

[Dowster]

I don't really like labels, they're not always very reliable, and often end up stuck on people for far longer than they're actually applicable (if they ever were in the first place)

Why do people feel the need to catagorize and anaylse everything, just smurf get on with your life and see what happens. Too much thinking seems to lead a lot of people to stress and depression. We should all just live like animals with low expectations